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From a mum of 12 days old

As I am writing this, a little girl of 12 days is lying beside me. She is too tiny to hold properly yet she has turned my world upside down. I have forgotten what a peaceful sleep means and how would it feel like going outside on my own...alone.
I just can't believe that I am feeling so. Having a baby was my long time dream. I have thought of names for my daughter when I myself was in school. After only an year of marriage, I have started pestering my husband to start a family (now I silently thank him for knowing that you are NEVER prepared for a tiny tot to join you)
It's not that I was not aware of the changes that a baby will bring in our world but still I feel as if I have been cheated.
I knew that a child would bring sleepless nights, I just did not have any idea about cluster feeding.
I knew that a kid would depend on me for filling his tummy, I just did not know about sore nipples.
I knew that I would be stucked in a room for 40 days of confinement period (and I was so much looking forward to this leisurely time of all rest & no work), I just never knew that rest would be this boring.
I knew that i would not cook or do laundry, I just had no idea that i will MISS cooking for my husband.
I knew that i would not go out for long, I just did not know that I would miss those carefree two wheeler rides this much.
I had no idea that i shall not feel content even after realising my long cherished dream. I wonder if something is wrong with me? If i am the same woman who cried her heart out and worked out hard to loose the extra flab which came between her and a baby?
I am just clueless, confused, perplexed and what not! :/
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  1. UnknownSeptember 19, 2017 at 4:24 AM

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